Based on Parrot tulips (1988) by Robert Mapplethorpe.
For “Why Don’t You Love Me Anymore?”, at Espace TOPIC, in Geneva.
Curated by Extra.Collective.
These parrot tulips
betoned how much
I will miss the touch
of our two lips.
The flowers you offered me
for our anniversary
fell
and I wish I could smell
you
the way that I used to.
The flowers were the only thing I could focus on.
Half of the scene welcomed a flare, as dawn
fought its way through the darkness of the night.
I knew I would have to put up the same fight.
It won’t be the last, he won’t be the last,
as I try to focus on the future rather than the past.
The night slowly swallows the last shine
reminding me you were no longer mine.
But I perceive sparks in the gloom.
I know I will too be able to bloom.
The bright colours of the flowers looking down
contrast with the emptiness filling the walls all around.
But next to it, the black vase’s relief
reflects the glow surrounding it – Relief!
Hope I seize.
Scope I cease.
•••
Flowers. Funny how one thing can symbolise love and death at the same time. Flowers… for the fallen ones, and the ones we’ve fallen for. I mourned our love as my desire to keep you with me felt like a fight against life’s power of separating people.
This morning, it hit me again as I read this poem one last time. These lines that I wish were longer, like I wish these years next to you were. These rhymes reflecting how we used to echo each other when I would tell you “I love you” and you would reply “me too”. These enjambments miming how we used to intricate our bodies when we would make love. But also, these stanzas parting, and this last couplet ending like we did.
My love for poetry and art might be the only love I will never suffer from, at least they will never leave my side. This might be a poem about heartbreak, but it might also be a love letter to them as both remind us that some canvases never leave their frame, and some words never leave their page. Nevertheless, I knew I would have to let you go – so I did.
Mourning.
Mourning.
Another morning without u.
© Michael Almeida Machado
Image
Robert Mapplethorpe, Parrot tulips, 1988.
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Michael Almeida Machado 